Cross-filed under Diplomacy. Bureau notified, forms pending.

A beige and dark-navy printed broadsheet carries the header "Official United States Government Guide" above the title "How to Survive a Bear Attack (By Reasoning with the Bear)," with a circular seal reading "U.S. Department of Bear Affairs" in the upper left and a document number box reading "BA-1955-19" in the upper right. Five numbered sections contain pen-and-ink illustrations: three bear-head diagrams labeled Calm, Anxious, and Nuclear Rage; a standing man in a red flannel shirt addressing a seated bear; four gift objects including a honey jar, a fish, a Spotify Premium card, and a kitten; a man and bear seated across a table with tea cups; and the same man tipping a hat while the bear raises one paw. Footer text reads "Be Kind. Be Calm. Bear Friends." in white lettering on a dark red band.

Jul 12, 2026

this image sits 4.2 bits from the center of the collection